There are pictures too!
I love dorm life.
I’ve been here for about 2/3 weeks now and I’m enjoying it. There’s a lot of freedom and you don’t have people constantly nagging at you. The course moves much more quickly too, they literally throw you into the deep end. Well anyway, here’s some thoughts on my life here:
My sentiments exactly.
I think that about sums up my random thoughts. I may post some more later. I understand it would probably be easier if I just used Twitter to do random musings like this… But I refuse.
[UPDATE] Another good one:
Oh and I found this while digging around my laptop:
This was the original essay.
This is the revised version for media after my teacher said it was to “Computer Science-y”.
They’re quite long, aren’t they? I have a (much) trimmed down version of this somewhere. But I can’t be bothered to look for it. And man this post has past 1500 words. Man.
It’s a bit bare bones, but I can deal.
Man, it didn’t feel that long ago since I left Secondary School…
Yes, it’s been confirmed.
University, here I come.
[UPDATE] I figured I owe you guys some more content and I was meant to have a longer post, but time constraints and excitement meant I had to cut short (seriously) the original post.
But anyway, today was results day for A-level students. The day that can make or break the next few years for a student. The day where people cry, laugh or breathe a sigh of relief. Fortunately, for me I got the required results I needed (and more!) which means in just over a month I’d be blogging from my sweet-ass dorm.
However, for many others, who have not gotten the results they so dearly needed – I give you my condolences. I know how difficult A-levels are and the weight of expectation can be overwhelming sometimes. Luckily for me, I thrive under pressure so I’m not bothered by circumstances like this but many are. And sometimes, it just drains your heart and soul. You’ll feel emotionally and mentally wrecked by the end and it may seem difficult to be optimistic about circumstances like this.
So I only have these words for these people: Try again.
That may sound harsh when read out loud, especially since tone of voice is hard to convey through the internet, but I mean this in the kindest of ways. Don’t give up, keep trying until you achieve what you wanted to achieve. The precursor to success is failure; it just means you’ll have to work harder next time. When life keeps knocking you down, just keep getting up and plowing straight ahead.
Anyway, enough crazy off-topic ranting. I just went on a complete tangent there as I pretty much type what I think of – obviously I cut out irrelevant content, otherwise you’d be seeing a lot more references to food.
I was going to describe my original feelings of today but now I realise I didn’t feel much about today. Making it rather anti-climatic. I was only reminded at the start of the week and even when my friends are worried and can’t get to sleep, I don’t feel that. I’m the kinda guy that takes what life deals at me and then throws the crap right back at it. I recognise that worrying about something out of my current control is absolutely stupid, it’ll only serve as a detriment to my mental health.
Not to say I didn’t have my doubts; while I was fairly certain I had gotten the grades I needed. One can never be completely sure, there’s always that small inkling at the back of the consciousness (or sub-consciousness) that always thinks pessimistically about what could happen. But as long as you the pessimism doesn’t take over and consume your mind, you’ll be fine.
And wow, this is beginning to feel like some zany story.
So, without further embarrassment to myself, I’ll end this post here. I’m going to be busy up until I’m settled in at my new dorm, so don’t expect much activity here.
So yea, I’m now officially –by law- classed as an adult. And let me tell you about how that is.
It’s the same.
I’m seeing little to no difference at all. Every kid looks forward to this day so you can now do anything you want (within legal boundaries, that is). But nothing magical happens. A fairy doesn’t appear at midnight to spray some fairy dust on you and take you to magical adult-land. Although, admittedly, that would be kinda cool.
Great, now I’m thinking about how adult-land would be like (and btw, I have no reason why I’m typing adult-land in italics). I’m imagining a world where the internet isn’t full of douche-bags and Xbox Live aren’t full of 12-year olds playing 18+ games. Wow, that tells a lot about me if the first thing I think about are the internet and XBL.
Anyway, I digress. Hitting the magical 18 feels no different than any other day. Ok, sure I don’t have to go “Erm… er… yea… about that…” whenever someone asks me for ID when buying a 18 game or trying to get into an 18 movie – which is cool, but I guess I just expected more. Like my brain just explodes with the sheer awesomeness of being an adult and everything that I didn’t really understand before just becomes shockingly clear. That might be a bit naive but all I’ve gotten is the fact that I sort of missed being young and in school. Things seemed were simpler back then, someone could point me towards a patch of grass and I would play in it for hours.
Oh great, I’ve just become an adult and now I’m starting to feel too old. People have always said my mind is more mature than my actual age, but I didn’t think I’d be thinking I’m growing too old now. I thought it’d be about the time I hit the 30 mark – which everyone seems to fear… for some reason or another.
Turning 18 has brought some perspective into what I want to do in the future. In the immediate future, I suppose I want to get into University this September – which promises to be an awesome experience if it’s anything like I think it’s going to be like; which it probably won’t be. But what about the future future? Like where I’d like to see myself 5, 10 or maybe 20 years into the future. It may sound crazy, but I haven’t really thought much about it before. I’m more of a “in the moment” guy, I find it hard to think past tomorrow.
Strangely though, I see myself playing video games for a long time. I just find the interactive medium really tantalising, it’s at the forefront of technology and it’s always changing. Always improving itself (supposedly). I’m not just talking about the mainstream video game scene either, sure they churn out some of the biggest hits and the biggest sellers. But, for true innovation, you’ve got to turn towards the indie scene and the flash game scene. That’s where you find true variety and not just endless sequels due to the fact that flash games don’t use hype and they only become popular if they are fun. That’s why I’m liking this trend where flash games are converted into XBL/WiiWare/PSN games. It’s great to see this happen and arguably, Behemoth paved the way for the industry with Alien Hominoid and they haven’t looked back. Castle Crasher’s is amazing fun and I’m loving the idea of co-op platformers.
Wow, I guess I really went onto a tangent there. But you understand where I’m coming from.
I was just poking around my website when I saw my archives:
Looking at that, I’m asking myself: What the f*ck happened?
No, seriously. In 2007 –when I started up this blog- I managed 279 posts. Then 2008 rolled around and that became 38 posts (that’s about 13.6% of the posts from the year before). And now it’s almost August and I’ve managed 4 posts (5, if you include this one) so far this year. I used to be so enthusiastic about posting here, but my desire to post has just diminished like a slowly dying fire at the crack of dawn.
Now, I know it’s not about quantity but quality(and hopefully, you’ll also agree that my writing style has improved for the better); a good example of which would be GaijinSmash or The Sneeze. But what I’m saying is that: why is it so hard to keep up a regular posting schedule. Something that my friend, Duck may tell you too.
It may be that initially, it’s something new and exciting. But as time wears on, it becomes like a chore. Monotonous and the same every-time. Not to mention that most of blogs like mine get little to no traffic, so there’s almost no incentive to continue writing. That’s why comments are so important, it shows people actually read a blog and wouldn’t mind helping to improve the blog by giving constructive criticism or just give a pat on the back for the writer. Ever since late 2007, I hardly ever received a comment and I just couldn’t tell if anyone was actually reading what I would post up onto the great information super-highway or all my traffic was just someone being directed here by Google Images to steal one of my images.
There’s just not enough support given for most of us small blogs to continue writing, which I understand is a lot to ask since there are tons of small blogs out there that have little to no traffic. But that’s not really what I’m asking. There are some genuine diamond in the rough blogs out there that should really get more coverage than they currently have. All I’m asking is to support some of them. Leave a comment, tell them what a good job they’re doing. It’s not something mind-blowingly hard.
I’ll let you think about this proposal and ultimately agree with me.
And while you’re in this mindset, why not start with my blog?
Although doing so may not even bring me back to posting regularly, I just don’t feel motivated to anymore. So now I just lurk around the internet like some crazed stalker, watching YT videos and browsing forums; in particular Duck's forum and the Bornegames forum. Maybe I’ll see some of you guys there.
EDIT#1: I’m visiting some relative near Manchester and we’ve rented out a pretty awesome hotel. Just thought I’d show you guys quickly.
Apparently I’m a lucky winner of a Windows 7 competition. And subsequently received a t-shirt and Windows 7 RC disk for my troubles.
The letter reads:
Dear John,
Congratulations you were one of the lucky winners of the Road to windows 7 competition! Please find enclosed your Windows 7 T-shirt and your Windows 7 RC disc.
And some other stuff you don’t need to worry about.
I quite like the t-shirt, it feels pretty good. And what better way to make people think I’m a nerd by wearing a windows 7 shirt! Hooray! I’m not so sure about the RC disc. If I wanted to I could get the RC from the internet, and it’s going to start shutting down soon anyway so it’s a bit pointless. It would’ve been better if they gave me the RC and a subsequent product-key for Windows 7 so I wouldn’t have to buy it. That would’ve been a good prize, but alas they didn’t (at least, I don’t think so).
I’m still chuffed I won, I’m not really sure how many people entered (my guess is not a lot, if I won). And it’s weird to have another t-shirt sent to me not long after I received the Little Big Planet t-shirt… which I don’t think I’ve shown you guys. It doesn’t really fit me –it’s too small, for once- so I gave it to my sister. It wasn’t really my style either, too superfluous. I’m not sure where it is now, but I haven’t seen my sister wear it once.
Yep, my college life has –hopefully- come to a close after today’s Maths (Statistics 2) exam. If I get the grades I require, I’ll be going to university this September which should be awesome.
I feel like I’ve been lugging a giant boulder around me for the last 2 years, and today I finally threw it off my back.
Picture is unrelated.
In other news, some friends and I went paintballing last Sunday which was a blast. I won’t bore you with the awesome details (like how many headshots I got) but I ended up with no paintball marks at all. While everyone else had at least several. It was a great day and I’d love to do paintball again. It’s not exactly cheap though, ended up costing me £53 all-together.
Still playing L4D at the moment as I promised myself that I’d only get Prototype after my exams have finished but I didn’t get to go to town today; probably won’t be able to go tomorrow either. So it’s Friday at the latest. :(
But no matter, L4D is still an amazing game to play with friends.
I’m not going to make excuses about my long absence from posting here, it’s been… what? 5 months? Even VGCats is updating more than me (HAR HAR). It’s probably inexcusable to the majority of you but many things have been going on in my life, as well as the coming of exams. But the main thing is probably the dying of my passion to post. More likely than not, you saw that in the last few posts that I did. It was new and exciting at first, but eventually it become a chore.
Anyway, I digress. The blog is probably going to become a place to output my creativity whenever I want to so posting will not be frequent.
I spent a night over at my uncle’s the other day. And some of you may or may not know this, but my uncle was probably the reason I’m such a gamer now. I recall nights when we would be huddled round a screen together playing some new fantastical game that he had bought. We would stay up until very late (and I mean very late, especially considering how old I was).
But now, he’s in his mid-30s (I think), married and has 3 kids. He doesn’t really have time to game anymore and it’s sort of depressing to see, he’s reduced to playing only in the wee hours of the morning. And even then, it’s only every other day at most. Not to mention the mid-range rig he sports is in his children’s room, so he has to play quietly. Quite unlike the days of yore, when we would scream and shout at our epic wins.
He’s also been reduced to buy only from bargain bins, for obvious reasons, so the majority of the games he plays aren’t particularly great and I don’t really have the heart to tell him. It’s upsetting to see someone who use to be at the forefront of gaming to lag behind so much. The latest game he bought was “The Spiderwick Chronicles” for the PC. And no, I’m not joking. Luckily for him (and me), it didn’t work on his computer and neither on my laptop. But he looked genuinely sad that the latest game he bought didn’t work, and it felt like someone tore out my heart and replaced it with a cold hard stone.
Don’t think that it’s all bad though. His gaming collection is still massive, he has tons of games from yesteryear, and quite a few are real gems. I decided to browse through his gargantuan collection and here are a few of the games I found:
>Colonization
>Sim Ant
>Sim City
>Theme Hospital
>Theme Park
>Rome Total War
>Shogun Total War (two of them in fact)
>Civilisation 1,2, 3 & 4
>Morrowind
>Balder’s Gate
>Neverwinter Nights
>Quake 1 & 2
>Halo 1
>Starcraft
>Dune 1,2 & 3
>Star Wars: KOTOR
>Quite a few old-skool Lucas Arts click & point adventures
>Games from the Thief series
>Typing of the Dead – no, I’m not kidding
>Wolfenstein
>Age of Empires 1 & 2
>Games from the Alone in the Dark series
>Clive Barker’s Undying
And the list goes on. I could probably sit here until the end of time just listing his games but I have better things to do (like revising for the 2 exams I have on Monday), there’s still some duds in his collection but that just makes it all the better. Currently I think he’s playing a game called: “Imperial Glory” as well as some other games.
Anyway, this post was mainly to show you one reason that I’m such a big gamer now (although it’s one of the primary reasons, it’s not the only one). Seeing as how my uncle is now, it seems like somewhere along the lines I deviated from him as I only really play console games now – I occasionally play PC games. A far cry from way back when, where I would only play exclusively on the PC. I guess part of the reason is the cost necessary to keep up with the latest specs to play the newest games but also console exclusivity – like Nintendo games etc.
I’m just wondering what I’d be like at his age. Would I still be gaming? Would I only get to game after in the early hours of the morning? Would I only be playing on the PC?
There’s so many questions that I could ask. But I won’t know the answers to until I actually get there. At least I should have a good time getting there. If all goes well, I’ll be gaming through university and after that. I don’t see me dropping my gaming obsession hobby anytime soon. Simply because of the intriguing new ideas the game industry keeps bringing in and the escapism factor, as well as entertainment factor.
Maybe when I’m my uncle’s age I could be gaming with my children, who knows what tomorrow will bring? That’s what makes life so exciting.
Currently playing: Left 4 Dead
Looking forward to: Prototype
As I said, I have no idea when my next post will come. It may come tomorrow, next week or another 5 months later. It’ll come when I feel the urge to write again. Until then: ciao.
[EDIT] As a note, I don’t mind if any of you guys add me on XBL. Maybe we could play some L4D/GTA IV/Halo 3 together. Just make sure you state that you know me through the blog.